I don't know if getting high while kittensitting is a great idea.
[ but even though derek keeps tate on something of a leash, he knows to leave him some slack. tate needs guidance and derek needs to guide, but there's a difference between looking after someone and playing into the dom role duplicity wants him to play into. tate's already accused him of doing that before. ]
[He'll - think on that. Decide if he likes the cats enough to not be selfish when he wouldn't mind toking off the balcony. He does really fucking love Cobain, though. Which makes him think...]
when do u think i can get cobs high as shit on cat weed she deserves it asap. but itd fuck the rats up right?
I guess when they're old enough to not... drink... her. That's gross. Sorry.
[ he's still worried about the party. ]
I could meet you. When you leave. Just outside the beach. Near enough to rescue you if there's trouble. Far away enough that I won't be seen. Could watch you set things up to make sure nothing happens.
It's not... babysitting. It's security. You know what happened the last time he threw one of these parties. I don't know why checking in on you to make sure you're okay would be such a bad thing.
it just feels like you don't trust me to do what i say i'll do i already told you i'd not *just* leave, but i wouldn't bring shit with me. not even a fucking beer. now you wanna police how and when i leave, too?
c'mon, derek. it's little much. but if you want to, fine. meet me. just don't complain about anything that happens while ur watching from the shadows
[ hold on. this is sudden. derek doesn't really know where this is coming from. he sits up a little straighter, eyebrows narrowed. ]
Hold on. I'm not... policing you. I trust you. I don't trust him. The guy's dangerous. I thought you'd like the idea of me... I don't know. Making sure he didn't touch you? Looking out for you the way I'm supposed to. Why are you acting like this?
i don't like it when people get all up in my shit i said i'd come, i don't need you hawking over me
like you said, there's only ten days left to my contract i'm still his sub until the thirteenth you gonna tell me that if you see him grab me by the hair for a kiss ur not gonna start shit?
I'm not getting all up in your shit. What the fuck are you talking about? You're the one who told me about the party in the first place. You're the one who told me how Kavinsky's been treating you. Am I only supposed to worry about you when you want me to worry about you? Is that it? This isn't a switch you can just turn off and on whenever you want.
[ dot dot dot. ]
I've given you incredible amounts of distance when it comes to him. Don't act like I haven't.
you're acting like my mother gonna stare out the fucking blinds to see what i'm doing never fucking trusting me to do something right all i'm asking is you trust me
[Tate's getting antsy.]
all i'm asking is you stop getting mad at me for sharing things with you i don't know what you want me to do. you said you were glad i shared those things. so why are you getting mad at me? blaming me for bringing it up?
i want you to be able to trust me. i want to be able to trust you. i like that you care about me but that didn't sound like care. it sounded like you just wanted control. so fine, have control but like i said. there's 10 days left so just promise me u won't start anything.
I. Trust you. I don't trust him. It's been three fucking months, Tate. I shouldn't have to make this point again and again and again. The guy gave you a bloody nose. You OD'd at his last party and he didn't do shit to help you. He probably doesn't even know it happened. I know he's done fucked up shit to you that you won't tell me about, because that's what people like him do. I. Don't. Trust. Him.
And I'm not mad at you for sharing things with me. I just don't understand what you're doing right now. Something really, really fucking bad happened to you the last time he threw a party, so I'm afraid of something bad happening to you again. That isn't being fucking controlling. "I want to be able to trust you". Jesus Christ. What am I supposed to say to that? You don't trust me. Cool. Good to know.
["You almost tore my throat out until I forced you to stop" is - what he wants to say, when it comes to trust. He had to make Derek bleed to get him to listen to him, so trust is a tentative thing. Now Derek's using his wording to be hurt and that just makes Tate angrier, breathing hard through clenched teeth.]
i told you i'll leave before it even starts. i told you i won't get drunk. i won't get high. i'm coming to you tomorrow. that should be enough. i didn't have to tell you about the party like i didn't have to tell you about what kavinsky's done but i told you. because i wanted to tell you.
you say you care about me and i believe it but i also believe that you'd kill him if you could you told me that, remember? i trust you, don't - don't play it off like i said i didn't i just said i WANT to trust you won't do shit and right now i'm not sure you won't because of how much you care about this.
i need to keep him pacified until the thirteenth he's not going to react to that well so i need to make sure he doesn't see it coming you get that, right? i know you don't like it. won't like it. but i have to do that right now. so i don't know how tomorrow will go but it won't go great if you pop on the headlights because you see him grab my ass
[ they're circling a little, and derek's too caught up in his own feelings to calm down and actually read between the lines here. tate's trying to calm him down, and he's being pretty smart about it, but derek's too angry and bruised for it to work. ]
Whatever. Okay. Do what you want. Text me tomorrow if you decide to stay at the party in the interests of "keeping him pacified".
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
no subject
[ but even though derek keeps tate on something of a leash, he knows to leave him some slack. tate needs guidance and derek needs to guide, but there's a difference between looking after someone and playing into the dom role duplicity wants him to play into. tate's already accused him of doing that before. ]
It's up to you.
no subject
[He'll - think on that. Decide if he likes the cats enough to not be selfish when he wouldn't mind toking off the balcony. He does really fucking love Cobain, though. Which makes him think...]
when do u think i can get cobs high as shit on cat weed
she deserves it asap. but itd fuck the rats up right?
no subject
That's gross.
Sorry.
[ he's still worried about the party. ]
I could meet you. When you leave.
Just outside the beach. Near enough to rescue you if there's trouble. Far away enough that I won't be seen.
Could watch you set things up to make sure nothing happens.
no subject
it's ok, i can handle it
some things i need to do on my own, no babysitting.
i won't let u down, ok? trust me.
no subject
It's security.
You know what happened the last time he threw one of these parties.
I don't know why checking in on you to make sure you're okay would be such a bad thing.
no subject
i already told you i'd not *just* leave, but i wouldn't bring shit with me.
not even a fucking beer. now you wanna police how and when i leave, too?
c'mon, derek. it's little much.
but if you want to, fine. meet me.
just don't complain about anything that happens while ur watching from the shadows
no subject
[ hold on. this is sudden. derek doesn't really know where this is coming from. he sits up a little straighter, eyebrows narrowed. ]
Hold on.
I'm not... policing you.
I trust you. I don't trust him. The guy's dangerous.
I thought you'd like the idea of me... I don't know. Making sure he didn't touch you? Looking out for you the way I'm supposed to.
Why are you acting like this?
What do you mean -- "anything that happens"?
no subject
i said i'd come, i don't need you hawking over me
like you said, there's only ten days left to my contract
i'm still his sub until the thirteenth
you gonna tell me that if you see him grab me by the hair for a kiss ur not gonna start shit?
because i need u not to do that.
no subject
You're the one who told me about the party in the first place. You're the one who told me how Kavinsky's been treating you.
Am I only supposed to worry about you when you want me to worry about you? Is that it?
This isn't a switch you can just turn off and on whenever you want.
[ dot dot dot. ]
I've given you incredible amounts of distance when it comes to him.
Don't act like I haven't.
no subject
gonna stare out the fucking blinds to see what i'm doing
never fucking trusting me to do something right
all i'm asking is you trust me
[Tate's getting antsy.]
all i'm asking is you stop getting mad at me for sharing things with you
i don't know what you want me to do. you said you were glad i shared those things.
so why are you getting mad at me? blaming me for bringing it up?
i want you to be able to trust me. i want to be able to trust you.
i like that you care about me but that didn't sound like care.
it sounded like you just wanted control. so fine, have control
but like i said. there's 10 days left so just promise me u won't start anything.
no subject
I don't trust him.
It's been three fucking months, Tate. I shouldn't have to make this point again and again and again.
The guy gave you a bloody nose. You OD'd at his last party and he didn't do shit to help you. He probably doesn't even know it happened.
I know he's done fucked up shit to you that you won't tell me about, because that's what people like him do.
I. Don't. Trust. Him.
And I'm not mad at you for sharing things with me. I just don't understand what you're doing right now.
Something really, really fucking bad happened to you the last time he threw a party, so I'm afraid of something bad happening to you again. That isn't being fucking controlling.
"I want to be able to trust you". Jesus Christ.
What am I supposed to say to that?
You don't trust me. Cool.
Good to know.
no subject
i told you i'll leave before it even starts.
i told you i won't get drunk. i won't get high.
i'm coming to you tomorrow. that should be enough.
i didn't have to tell you about the party
like i didn't have to tell you about what kavinsky's done
but i told you. because i wanted to tell you.
you say you care about me and i believe it
but i also believe that you'd kill him if you could
you told me that, remember?
i trust you, don't - don't play it off like i said i didn't
i just said i WANT to trust you won't do shit
and right now i'm not sure you won't
because of how much you care about this.
i need to keep him pacified until the thirteenth
he's not going to react to that well so i need to make sure he doesn't see it coming
you get that, right?
i know you don't like it. won't like it. but i have to do that right now.
so i don't know how tomorrow will go but it won't go great if you pop on the headlights because you see him grab my ass
no subject
Whatever. Okay.
Do what you want.
Text me tomorrow if you decide to stay at the party in the interests of "keeping him pacified".
no subject
talk to you tomorrow then.
no subject